Wildlife Woes.

I forgot to mention on my previous post Bugging Out , about a situation I experienced back in college while running errands with my good friend, Cassie. There we were driving along with the windows rolled down, enjoying the crisp Arizonan air, when all of the sudden something flew into the car. Cassie began looking around frantically to identify the new intruder and finally she found the culprit:

But let me tell you something, that thing did not look as majestic and carefree as this picture portrays. It was the most horrible locust we had ever seen and about the size of a smallish rodent. As soon as we both discovered what the thing that had entered our car so invasively was, Cassie shot to the back seat while I was left to pull over.

After I parked, we both jumped out of the car instantaneously. Ever since it had first looked us square in the eyes when it flew in, we had lost its location thus we began furiously (but from a safe distance I might add) searching for it. Once located we were even more helpless because we couldn't remove it. Finally, the wretched thing flew out and we continued on our merry way but we were slightly scarred. 

Once we arrived home, I immediately got on the internet to classify this creature. I think I typed in something to the effect of "Grasshopper, huge, horrid", and the African Locust popped up. Terrifying. 

I am remembering this story all too clearly recently because I was in the backyard doing some pool work and noticing that something has once again defecated in my spotless grotto. And this is humanish size feces people. I don't know what could have made its way in there after I sprayed Raid like a mad woman in there hoping it would back off the spiders and their webs. Apparently some small human is squatting into our grotto in the middle of the night. Either that or a bobcat.... I go with the former. 

Anyway, I am brushing away when I notice this out of the corner of my eye. Not only is it the African Locust, it is two of them hoping to create more horrid locusts. But do not fret, I put a stop to that real quick with a little but of salty pool water. Killed the mood instantly.

There was no way I was just going to stand by and let this creepy things continue the reproductive circle of life. No freaking way.

Also, on my way home from work last night (I worked the fish fry again for the first time in months), there was a javelina hanging out on my driveway. Javelinas as beastly looking boars. This one even had a little circle of cactus stuck to its leg. I had to honk my horn so it would run away and I could safely open my garage door without fear it would park next to me. Luckily it ran away.

Then I noticed a coyote chasing a quail around on the side of the road leading to my neighborhood. That thing looked famished. And there was a tarantula on the sidewalk in my development the other night.

So don't worry, I'll tell you what you can deduce from all of this: I am sick of the wildlife that surounds me. Conveniently winter is fast approaching. Hibernation and hunting season. Get rid of 'em.

Boom. Posted. 

A Wonderful Wedding in Charming Charleston

Megan & Jared Davison

September 10, 2011

Charleston, South Carolina

I had the amazing experience of flying to Charleston this past weekend to be a bridesmaid for my dear friend Megan. She lives out in Philadelphia so not only was it wonderful for her to wed but it was just as great to see her in person. 

Holden Beach, 2001

Megan and I met when my family first moved to South Carolina when I was about to start 6th grade. I knew that our neighbors had a girl my age so I moseyed on over to introduce myself and ask if she wanted to go on a bike ride. And yes, I did still have a hot pink Huffy.

She agreed and our friendship has continued to blossom ever since. Our families are close as well and needless to say, I knew this experience was going to be emotional.

And it was.

Luckily I got the worst of my pathetic and pitiful sobbing out at the rehearsal because I was truly afraid of not being able to contain myself. It was just too weird to know that my Megan was getting married. Of course I couldn't be happier for her and Jared, but it was still strange coming to terms with it all. 

The trip was busy and filled with luncheons and rehearsals and Citadel boys and shrimp & grits. It was a very southern weeding weekend. And I loved every minute. 

Usually I am not very fond of the south. I think the people are very nice but I prefer my west coast status.  I thoroughly enjoyed zipping around Charleston and seeing the colleges in the area. These included College of Charleston and the Citadel. Megan's little sister attends CofC (Like Megan did) and her dorm is right next to an EINSTEINS BAGEL! ... but she has never been. WHAT? Also it accepts her meal plan... Let's just say if that were me, I would be cramming my face full of 'garlic toasted with plain shmear' every freaking day! She crazy.

Jared graduated from the Citadel and the Citadel Chapel was where the two had their ceremony. It was beautiful and needed no decoration. Also during the rehearsal I tried to convince the Priest that he should begin the ceremony with "Mawwiage, Mawwiage is what bwings us hewe togethew today" Like on the Princess Bride:

Hahaha, I think he was actually considering it.

The rehearsal dinner was out at a restaurant on the water. It was the perfect place for dinner, which was Low Country Boil. I am sure many of you have never had Low Country Boil and what it literally consists of is shrimp, boiled red potatoes, half corns on the cob, and sausage slices. That's it. I am used to it from our stays at the beach but it is not necessarily my favorite meal. So after I had my fill of potatoes and sausage (and I did eat 2 shrimp, Mom!) I was left to hang out with the flower girl and ring bearer.

The cutest little things I ever did see. Eventually there was a break dance contest between the three of them. I'll let you decide who the winner was:

All the moves in all the right places.

The ceremony the next day was just beautiful. We had a very relaxing day since the wedding was not until 6pm. The reception was at this old Charleston house, the Wickliffe House, it was the most stunning venue imaginable. 

They had a the tent setup outside with the band and a dance floor. Abar outside and a bar inside. Food stations to include shrimp and grits. I have completely forgotten that grits even existed before my trip but those were the best grits I have ever had. Megan's mother told me it was the cream that made it so delicious.

After they announced the wedding party onto the dance floor, Megan and Jared had their first dance to Free by the Zac Brown Band. And then Megan danced with her father to Steven Curtis Chapman's Cinderella. 

That would have been the time where I lost all of my bearings completely. I was bawling my eyes out. It was so touching. And then Megan's mother went out an joined them. Perfection.

The rest out the night was just nonstop excitement. Since I did not know many of the guests, I was hanging out with majority of the groomsmen all night and playing wingman for Megan's younger sister and cousin with the Citadel cadets. I told them I was a good wing man because I go in so completely obnoxious that the guys will have to choose to hang out with them in order to get away from me.... I think it worked.

Also by the end of the night, I convinced one of the cadets to let me try on his coat and hat, brilliant idea.

Needless to say it was a fun filled night. The happy couple drove off in an old black cab into the night. And they are still married to this day! (One week later)

Congratulations Megan and Jared, best wishes!

Boom. Posted.