Library Folk.

School work has been killing me. I feel as though whenever I turn around, I have another million assignments due and I can't keep them all straight no matter how ritually organized I am. This past Sunday night I had a 15 page paper due in my Human Diversity class on a topic of our choosing that related to the class. I chose: the Ableism of Autism. Ableism is essentially discrimination against people with disabilities and autism is sometimes so mysterious I figured it would be an excellent topic.

Now here is a somewhat side note. The in person class I just started 3 weeks ago is Self-Management Techniques and its 4 hours every Thursday with a room of about 12 people, twice my age. In this class the whole grade is based on our self-management project that we chose in order to better ourselves. What do I pick every time I ned some self-adjustment... to cease procrastination. Without fail that is what I choose and ironically I wait until the last minute to put it into effect. 

Well I had a great elaborate plan of using my new techniques to work on this paper but things were already on a rocky start when I realized around March 24th that the paper was not due May 6th like I thought... it was due April 10th. First mistake. Second mistake was that I knew my parents were coming into town that whole week before and I would get nothing school wise done (but everything that had to do with house fixing). My parents leave, I have dozen of opportunities to begin, I do not wait until Saturday to go to the public library, and furiously tap this thing out. 

I had never been to this library, before other than to donate books, but I knew I would hate the atmosphere so much that it would force me to not be distracted and work as fast as I could. Lucy came to study as well and boy was she prepared with her ear plugs AND noise canceling headphones... I was beyond jealous considering I was forced to listen to a very old man hack up a lung every 10 minutes like clockwork. The whole time I was 'enjoying' the library folk I was thinking of how I should be capturing every moment so I had a list up that I continually added to as the hours slowly passed.

Here is the list and I will explain the bullets later:

• Man with avatar ponytail. Cradles it behind his back while browsing. 
• Man hacking up a lung every 10 minutes
• Woman disinfecting computer area. Purple schrunchie. Probable cat t-shirt. Folds lysol wipe after use. Looking up Tucson vacation rentals.
• Guy in neck brace.
• Little girl rearranging bookmarks.
• Mariachi band
• Teen girl may or may not be watching something rated NC-17. Looks over shoulder every few seconds.  Screen brightness is at an all time low...
• Girl running around with a pocket full of tictacs.

Okay let's start with the beginning. I am just getting situated, setting up my notebook and articles and what not. Man walks by looking rather clean cut (well as far as a library regular can be) from the front, turns the corner only to display the never ending party in the back that consists of a braid going all the way down to his vertical smile, butt that is. It was an avatar braid and if you haven't seen the movie I apologize because I just cannot find a good enough picture to capture the essence of this braid. Awful.

After that a woman walks over to the computer table next to me. Sits down and immediately pulls out a Lysol wipe and disinfects the entire area... leaving nothing to chance. And then continues to fold aforementioned wipe and places it meticulously next to the keyboard which she finally renders safe to touch. I almost wanted to yell out STOP! just to freak her out. Then she spends the whole time looking up rental locations in Tucson... strange. 

A guy in a neck brace just casually walks by, clearly in pain but not enough to skip out on library day. 

Three little girls then show up at the magazine rack. One of them has a pocketful of tictacs or something because she is running around and it sounds like hail hitting the windows. Then another one insists on rearranging all the bookmarks, one at a time, putting them in their appropriate locations. 

Oh and did I forget to mention, Saturday is "Hey, guess what? The Mariachi band is going to play for an hour" day? Yeah, it is. 

But the award for the biggest library weirdo goes to this teenage girl who was originally watching Pretty Little Liars on YouTube, now has her screen brightness all the way down and is continuously looking over at me to see if I can see watch she is watching... I couldn't and I think I may be glad of that. 

All in all it was successful because I did finally finish my paper and also got my own library card... its an exclusive deal. It was a nice place to study, but it would have been better had I come as prepared as Lucy.

Boom. Posted.

The Queen of Pranks.

Many of this may know this about me but for those of you who don't... I am the master of all pranks, an yesterday my brother called me the Queen. April Fool's Day is one of m favorite holidays because you can get away with pranking people, especially my family because they are too lazy to come up with anything back most of the time.


This year I was getting a little anxious because I had not really thought about what to do until a brilliant idea struck my mind... changing my facebook birthday. Now some would think that this is just a small change and most of my friends would pick up on it... Nope. I figured if my friends were anything like me, they just check the top right corner of their facebook everyday and wish people 'happy birthday' left and right. So I changed it two days in advance so it wasn't abnormally fishy and could hardly wait until the monday of the 1st arrived...


 I woke up to a text from my friend Cassie which read "So tempted to ruin ur April fool's joke...... But i won't and will allow people to continue to pepper ur wall with bday wishes". To which I thanked her. Then I was so excited I logged on immediately and noticed it had already begun. My other friend Dana messaged me: "Nice April Fools joke! Hahaha I go "aww Lauren's bday" and then i was like "WAIT A MINUTE!!" I won't blow your prank 10 minutes in! :D See who really knows you!". 


Well apparently not many people knew me or just automatically wished me well on my birthday. I had more people try to sabotage my prank more than anything and Mara went as far as to post in on her status that "It is not Lauren's birthday! She is a prankster!". But even with the saboteurs at bay, my dedicated friends persevered to wish me the happiest of days.


Unfortunately I had to work all day at the club or else I would have been monitor of the prank ruins, but the whole thing went over very well. And almost all of my friends were with 'space cadets' or truly fooled. 


The last prank I pulled was saran wrapping the toilets of my old sorority house last year... genius. And before that I taped the sprayer by the sink so when anyone turned on the faucet, they were immediately sprayed with water... got my mom real good. 


This year my dad ran into my room saying that my boss called and the clubhouse caught fire so I didn't have to work today. I was only surprised because he startled me awake, but I called him on his foolin'.  Then I used it on Blake via text message, got him good, too :)


But yesterday was definitely a prank-filled day because I used the birthday one at work but then told everyone 'April Fools!' quickly after. I was in charge of the keg up at one of the holes because it was a tournament for a charity. The volunteers at my hole were crazy and we had two former college athletes. WEll right as the general manager tapped the keg for me and was about to drive off he said "Oh, and everyone, its Lauren's birthday today!".... and I never said April Fools.... the whole I was 23 and the life of the party.... of course!


All in all, one of the best April Fool's Days I have ever had.... April Fool's!! 

Or is it? You'll never know...